Amy's Life - 2009 Recap

At the closing of 2009 I feel a bit reflective, not to mention it is a wonderful opportunity to introduce myself to potential readers (welcome, by the way). 2009 has been a great year, and a rough year. I started the year living with my wonderful boyfriend who has traveled a similar road as I. We both grew up in small towns in Kansas, went to a secondary school, married and divorced from people who were in our lives at the time we thought would get married (we married because it was the time to get married), both of our exes managed to help us spend our way into some pretty hefty debt - which both he and I took more of the responsibility for (by choice or not), and we each lived in a house that we owned, renting out part to help make ends meet, and we were both on Match.com looking for someone to spend our lives with. We met in March 2008, by October 2008 he moved in with me, committing to a 2 hour round trip commute each day.

So, as I was saying 2009 started with my wonderful boyfriend. The spring was fairly uneventful, in a good way. June was very busy, I started with photographing local dance recitals, and attending a photography school in Iowa for a week, photographing local baseball teams, and getting engaged! My man, D, proposed to me when I returned home from the school in Iowa, and totally caught me off guard!

We decided to have a short engagement, and keep the wedding simple. Our ceremony was August 28, in a park near my Grandparents home. We had only immediate family attending, my parents, my brother and his family, D's parents, his siblings and families, and my grandparents. It was everything we wanted.

Just about one month later we found out I was pregnant! It was very exciting, we hadn't planned it but were very, very excited. The next 6 weeks seemed like an eternity waiting for the next appointment with the Dr to find out more about the baby, to make sure everything was ok, to see him or her, to begin our family. November 16 was the first time we saw the baby on the sonogram. It was beautiful, and exciting, and heartbreaking. For some reason, the baby's heart had not developed normally, and was not beating. The baby was not alive. That was the hardest day of my life.

There have been many hard days since then. Luckily I was busy with work to keep myself from falling into a deep depression. My desire to keep my business afloat managed to keep me from being a total mess. But I give myself more credit than I deserve, My new husband, who was always so supportive, became my strength. He kept me from falling when I could have easily crumbled.

The holidays were hard. Gathering with families were not how I imagined them to be, as a pregnant Amy. There were lots of things I would rather be doing than celebrating holidays with family (which really isn't normal for me). I survived, and I did enjoy seeing family, despite the nagging saddness and loss that still plagued me daily.

So that brings us up to date. For 2010, I will have a positive outlook. I know there are wonderful things that happen with the power of positive thinking. D and I want to start our family (our human family, our 4 furry children are well loved, though) and we know that the next time that I get pregnant, the baby will be healthy!